Autumn Awakening

This is by far my favorite time of the year. There is nothing more beautiful than the Adirondack Mountains in the fall. Living in the mountains is a different experience in itself. The weather is very unpredictable, with changes on the hour sometimes, and not always for the better! Although it means the end of summer, it is still a time I always look forward to. The change in the clouds, that chill in the air, and the amazing changing of the leaves. It is just indescribable.

Besides the awesome mood that the fall puts me in, it always makes me want to travel. It has been this way for as long as I can remember. There is just something in the change of weather and scenery that makes me want to hit the road. Road trip! It seems that every time I have moved to a different part of the country it was in the fall. First to Colorado. That was in September. Then to Florida. That was in September too! And now here I am in this gorgeous place that I love so much. I know that I will always miss the beach and have a need to be there at least some of the time, but I have grown to love the mountains so much. I really just can't imagine living anywhere else.

So, in this season that I treasure and look forward to each year, I am starting anew. I signed up for a 6 week online course in meditation and spirituality that I can't wait to start. It is with the renowned Spirit Rock Meditation Center in California (of course, right!) and is being taught by a wonderful teacher with years of experience. I have also started walking again. Not too far yet, but it's a start! What's that saying, just put one foot in front of the other and do it! Also, as usual, I am still struggling with my food intake, but you know what....I am just going to stop worrying about it and obsessing about it so much. I will take each day and live it fully. I will try to be the best person I can be and so be it. 

Also, I am reading some great books. The chilly fall weather is a great time to snuggle up with a warm blanket and a terrific book! So here's hoping that you all have a wonderful autumn and enjoy each day and stay happy and healthy!

Peace and Happiness,

Laurie

Wellness Reviewed-The Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth

I'm back! I have not written a post in quite a while. Whether or not anyone has even noticed is of no concern to me, really. You see, I admit that I do this for myself. If along the way what I write is helpful or encouraging to anyone, that is just a wonderful added bonus. I want to believe that I am a selfless, caring person who puts everyone else's needs before my own, but I'm thinking that's not really the truth...And if there is one thing that I have learned, it is that the truth really will set you free. So here goes....

I have just re-read all of the posts that I have written so far. I have to admit that I was impressed! When I was much younger (We are talking high school here people...) I loved to write. I wrote poems, stories and even my feelings about what was happening in my life at the time. English was always my favorite subject and I always loved to read. Over the years life interrupted. I no longer thought I had time to write. Perhaps it was just what I needed, more than ever, but I didn't realize it at the time.

Fast forward to the present. We really don't need to rehash all that stuff in the past again do we? So moving forward is the way to go. What I realized as I was reading what I had written is that I was in a pretty good place thought wise. What I wrote made sense, to me anyway, and I really do believe in what I wrote about. The thing is, a person can be in a pretty good place one day and a not so good place the next. I am not saying that I totally lost it and started eating meat again. No sir! I have continued to abstain from all meat. In fact, I have been eating healthier than ever. I am eating a large salad everyday along with my green smoothie and other healthy concoctions. I have been meditating for the past five weeks daily and have tried to keep at least slightly active along the way. Slightly means just walking with no real form of organized exercise, but hey, it's what I can do right now and that's ok. So, as of right now, I am back in a pretty good place. Now here comes the truth part....

Back about a month and a half ago, I was not in such a great place. I was still abstaining from meat, but I was also back into the sugar. Remember what I wrote about my battle with the Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream? Well, this time around, I lost the battle. Since that happened it has been harder than ever to come to grips with it again...The fact that I am probably forever addicted to sugar and each time I slip and overeat sugary products, I will fall flat on my face again for a while. The funny thing about this time though is that even though I slipped (and in doing so, put back on six pounds...) it was not for as long a time as in the past. I was totally aware of what I was doing each step of the way. I realized that the minute I gave into that craving for ice cream I would be feeling sick to my stomach (a result of the gastric bypass surgery I had 6 years ago...) and depressed because I was a failure. Now I know that failure is a strong word, but I am sometimes very hard on myself. Since my slip up, I have had good days and bad days. Lately though there have been more good days than bad and I am grateful for that. The main thing that doing my meditation each day has taught me is that the past is the past and the future, of course, has not happened yet, so all we really have is the present. Just the fact that I was able to stop and think about how I would feel after I ate the ice cream is a great improvement for me! I guess that might sound strange, but I am usually not as thoughtful before I give in to a sugar craving. By just slowing down and realizing what the result might be if I ate it was monumental for me.

By taking time to think about how great I feel when I eat healthy compared to how not great I feel when I eat crap, I am moving forward in the right direction. Be it ever so slowly, I am coming to grips with the fact that I am just a not-so-perfect human being. Yes there will be good days, but somewhere in there will be the bad ones too, and I am ok with that. I really am.

Peace & Love Within Yourself

Laurie





Please feel free to leave a comment below! (If there is anyone out there....)

How To Stop Being A Victim

"Stop being a victim and thinking that life happens to you. You have the strength to change anything in your life. If you don't like something then get up your courage and change it. You are more powerful than you think you are. To make changes in your life you have to be truly ready and willing." I read this quote somewhere and I really liked it. I liked it so much that I wrote it down and put it on a sticky note and saved it. I thought it would inspire me to do better.

Hmm....Sounds good, right? Then why has it taken me so many years to get to this point. Why did I insist on making the same mistakes over and over again without learning the obvious lesson to be learned. I believe it was the part about being truly ready and willing that had me a bit confused. You see in order to move forward successfully one has to leave the past behind. Not drag it along with you like a ball and chain.

Change is life. Everything changes from moment to moment, but when you are unwilling to move along and change with it you remain stuck. Stuck in the same place you were in ten years ago. My life seemed to be a series of repeats. I would try to be strong and change the way I was doing things and for a while it would work. Eventually though I would always end up back at the same spot again.

In the past two years I have gone through some drastic changes in my life. They are what I consider to be permanent changes. The most drastic is the way I now eat. I have not eaten much meat for years now, but I don't eat any at all anymore. I consider this a permanent change because the way I think about it has changed to the point that I am absolutely unable to eat meat. I have certain thoughts about it that enable me to do this without any problem at all. The other change is I refuse to do anything that will make me very unhappy while I am doing it. This includes jobs, doing things for other people, anything that just doesn't feel right in my gut. I have no problem doing something that I don't feel like doing as long as it is being done for the right reason. Such as, to help someone. I just refuse to be used by anyone.

The other thing I have stopped doing is feeling sorry for myself. Granted I never did too much of that anyway, but I did it enough. Instead of wondering why I could never stick to whatever new diet was out there to try, I researched until I found the right fit for me. Then I pushed forward and did it. No wishy, washy reasons why I couldn't do it. I just did it because I knew it was the right thing for me. Let's face it, I was finally ready to change. Ready and willing. I was ready to let go of all the reasons that I couldn't do it and grab onto the reasons I needed to do it. All the right reasons.

Sometimes a person can think too much about why he or she does things. Sometimes it really is better to just go ahead and do it. (Hence the famous Nike saying....) Dwelling too long on all the reasons you can't do something just gives you more time to come up with other reasons not to do it. So next time you know for sure that what you are doing is not working, close your eyes for a few minutes and try to picture the way you want it to be instead. If what you see is what you truly want deep in your gut, then go for it! Take a giant leap forward and hang on for dear life. Don't look back, no matter how much you may want to. There are great things ahead for you! All you have to do is know for sure that you deserve it.



Peace & Good Luck,

Laurie